Continuing two years of tradition, here are the rules for this year's game.
Standard Rules: Take a drink the first time each of the following events occurs.
- Anyone claps.
- Anyone voices a standard complaint about the conference proper (one drink each): high registration fees, parallel sessions, overlaps beginning of classes, overlaps weekend
- Anyone voices a standard complaint about the conference hotel (one drink each): expensive, bad meals, bad informal food (eg, coffee breaks, continental breakfasts, reception)
- Anyone voices a standard complaint about SIAM (one drink each): full-time registration staff, unnecessary/ineffective publicity, rude registration emails, difficult web pages, poor negotiation of hotel room rates/amenities, general incompetence, greed
- Anyone makes a standard suggestion for “improving” the conference format (one drink each): removing the 10-page limit, imposing a smaller page limit, adding shorter talks, making all talks shorter, adding another day (one drink per additional day), adding more parallel sessions (one drink per additional session), adding paper-free talks, adding a poster session
- Anyone uses the phrase "discrete mathematics community" or equivalent
- Anyone complains that conference papers aren't supposeed to be archival
- Anyone makes a joke involving the phrase "train wreck"
- David Johnson uses the passive voice (eg, "it was decided" instead of identifying the decider(s))
The Adam Buchsbaum Statistics Bonus Round:
- Take one drink for each slide of statistics displayed by the PC chair.
- If your name appears on the PC chair's slides for any reason, finish your beer.
The "Chocolate City" Location Bonus Round:
- Drink once for each proposal except San Francisco and Baltimore/DC.
- Take an extra drink if the proposed location is outside the continental U.S. (e.g., Cancun, San Juan).
- Take an extra drink the proposed location is a university campus (e.g., UC Santa Barbara).
- Take an extra drink if you can't tell whether the proposal is serious (e.g., Las Vegas).
- Drink once each time David Johnson downplays a serious but non-standard proposal, because it would be difficult for SIAM to organize.
- If someone volunteers to take over local organization duties from SIAM, buy them a beer.
- Drink once each time either David Johnson or a SIAM representative refuses to consider such an offer because SIAM insists on organizing conferences themselves.
The Diebold Accuvote-TS Voting Bonus Round:
- If anyone asks if we can vote for more than one option, take a drink.
- If any vote is repeated beause of voter confusion, take a drink.
- If any vote ends in a tie, take two drinks.
- If anyone suggests that David Johnson is attempting to manipulate the vote, take two drinks.
- If David Johnson makes this suggestion, finish your beer.
The "Empire Builder" Proceedings Bonus Round:
- This bonus round begins when someone suggests electronic proceedings. Take a drink.
- If anyone suggests eliminating paper proceedings, take a drink
- Take a drink each time any of the following words are used: copyright, ArXiv, ISBN, web, PDF, library, tenure, ship/shipping, heavy, Amazon, profit/money/cost
- Take one drink for each suggested electronic medium (CD-ROM, USB key, web, etc.)
The Armageddon Bonus Round:
- If anyone seriously suggests getting rid of SIAM sponsorship, finish your beer.
- If anyone suggests that the SODA steering committee shoudl be democratically elected, shout "¡Viva la Revolucion!" annd finish your beer.
- If anyone suggests resurrecting short papers in any form, clap your hands and chant "We Voted No! We Voted No!" until the subject is changed, and then finish your beer.
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