Jay Wood at Toilet Paper with Page Numbers discusses picking your poison thesis advisor, with a handy guide to identifying the various species of computer science chemistry science profs in their native habitat. Classify your colleagues! Identify yourself!
The Micromanager: Usually an eminently respected scientist who is keenly aware of the ponzi scheme that is grad school in experimental science: i.e. there is a huge need for researchers at the graduate student and post-doc level, but the Boomers have all the tenure-track positions locked up until 2017. Is usually a Boomer his or herself.The Ambitious Geek: Usually a younger professor. Absent tenure, this choice of advisor is fraught with peril, as tenure denial results in having to pack up the lab for another institution [...]. He or she is counting on you to come up with a way to execute hair-brained schemes to get enough results for a publication.
The Creative Genius: An older researcher who, at one point in the past, struck a home-run or two and is now flush with cash. [...] Usually gives students a lot of room to pick their own projects, and has the money to let you develop your ideas. That’s great if you, yourself are creative, but a nightmare of a 7-year Master’s degree if you are not.
The Absentminded Professor: Likely more interested in teaching than most and may be writing an undergraduate textbook. Look out, because you can never get him or her to focus on your project long enough to get a paper out.
The Bitter Fundless Twit: Usually has low-to-no funding because he or she either ran out of ideas post-tenure, or is not politically astute enough to write grant applications that bend with the prevailing winds.
The Political Player: Smooth operator. More interested in policy than science, this one may be an officer in a professional society, and definitely has a role in the NSF / NIH, or other governmental agency. As with the Absentminded Professor, may be hard to reach, but boy-oh-boy will you have connections if you graduate.
The Emeritus-in-Training: Very old professor with a magnificent scientific reputation. Usually is not as picky about quality as he (almost always a he) once was. OK if you want to slide by, but the danger is health and patience. If he gets sick or gets fed up with University politics, he may just retire on you, and you’ll be out begging other professors to take you in. This will probably add years to your Ph.D. and turn you into a bitter alcoholic.
Update (May 30): Okay, so yes, Jay's a chemist, and if you actually read his post you can see that he's describing chemistry profs. But I didn't even notice that the first time I read his post; his classification fit computer science so well that it didn't even occur to me to check his field. So -10 to me for reading comprehension, and +10 to Jay for describing more than he thought.
[via TDM]
LOL. Oh, my God. If you crossed an ambitious geek with a bitter fundless twit, you would be right on the money. It makes me feel better that my mentor's behavior can be generalized. In all fairness, there really should be a graduate student counterpart to this listing.
Posted by: SFTR | May 23, 2005 at 06:56 AM
LOL. Nice list!
Posted by: buzz | May 23, 2005 at 09:08 AM
>This will probably add years to your Ph.D. and >turn you into a bitter alcoholic.
What's wrong with that?
Posted by: | May 23, 2005 at 10:19 AM
Ernie, you know I’m a chemist, don’t you? I’m glad I was general enough to strike a universal chord or two out there in CS land. And SFTR, I’m thinking about the grad student version. Damn, I’ll really have to make sure that I remain anonymous when that one comes out.
Posted by: Jay | May 29, 2005 at 09:42 PM
As an educator myself, I can actually relate to many of these descriptions, though I feel somewhat like an anarchist to admit it! Many who are not in academia don't realize how politically charged and motivated it really is!
Posted by: thebizofknowledge.com | September 03, 2006 at 09:13 PM